Of female advice and anger

This comparison of two quotes from Michelle Langley's book on female infidelity demonstrates the intrinsic flaw in thinking that simply paying more attention to what women are thinking will help men improve their success with them. Note that the two quotations are separated by all of six pages.

"When women start getting that uncomfortable feeling about sleeping with their husbands and they start making excuses not to have sex, they’re usually scared. The feeling is familiar to them. They’ve experienced it before in prior relationships. They are also afraid of their husband’s reaction to their disinterest in sex. They’re afraid their husband will cheat on them or eventually leave them because of it. It’s like having a problem falling asleep when you know that you have to get up early. Your fear of not being able to sleep actually keeps you awake. Women’s fear of not wanting to have sex keeps them from ever wanting sex. They become preoccupied with their disinterest in sex. Men may even fuel their wife’s fear by implying that they may go elsewhere for sex or leave them because of it, which is the worst thing a man can do if he wants to help the situation."

"Today, Kevin wanted advice on how to rekindle sexual desire. I think he’s under the impression that if he does what I recommend he will be able to fix his problems with Tracey. Unfortunately, if someone else has entered the picture it’s probably too late for that. Tracey’s problem will no longer be rooted in a loss of sexual desire, but in the awakening of sexual desire."

Although she's correct in that it is too late to fix a married couple's problems once those problems involve more people than the two who are married to each other, Langley's advice is the exact opposite of Roosh and Roissy's and runs directly counter to Athol's as well. Ironically enough, the flawed nature of her advice can be seen for a reason that she herself identifies: "It’s impossible for you to understand anything about women in this country today, unless you understand that a) they’re angry, and b) their anger is directed at men.Women today aren’t seeking equality. They want retribution—revenge."

Now, obviously not all women are angry, much less seeking revenge for the vicissitudes of human history, and those who are angry are not angry because, as Langley piously asserts in conventional feminist manner, they are an oppressed people enraged by thousands of years of societal suppression. In my observation, women are primarily angry because of the imbalance between their perception imposed by 16+ years of relentless feminist propaganda and the experience of objective reality. But it should be obvious that one doesn't placate anger by supplication, and anyone with any knowledge of Game knows that whereas women respond very badly to BETA responses, they counterintuitively tend to respond in a more mutually positive manner when the fear of abandonment Langely mentions is stimulated. The problem with Kevin's response wasn't that he mildly suggested that he was unhappy his wife had gone off sex with him, it was that he didn't make it clear that she would be responsible for ending the marriage if she didn't get her act back together.

Regardless of one prefers the Dread approach or Athol's more civilized program of self-improvement, it is important for men to be decisive and make it clear that "loss of desire" is absolutely and totally unacceptable in any marriage barring genuine medical issues.

Similarly, if things have already progressed to what Langley calls the third stage in which a wife is being consciously attracted to other men despite her so-called "loss of desire" and is openly talking about separation, decisively applying the core Game tactic of amplification is probably the only thing that might head off an imminent affair at the pass. In this case, the man shouldn't attempt to pull her back to him, but rather push her away, hard and fast. This tactic works very well for players, so it has at least the potential to work with wives who are already mentally at least one step out the door.

The core principle is very straightforward. If a woman doesn't actively want to be with you, then you certainly do not want to be with her. And in case you're not sure that it's the Game guys and not the adulterous women who have it right, then consider this assertion from Langley: "Eventually men and women will abandon traditional gender roles and find new ways of relating to one another."

This time it's different. That sounds so familiar! Now, where, I wonder, have I heard that before?