A few weeks ago I wrote a blog post called Starting Over. It was a summary about my recent experience of leaving a comfortable job to pursue my passion of writing. I mentioned that I have been a writer for a large majority of my life, but I never acknowledged it. I find that many times I tend to get in the way of my own success and I compromise to make others happy rather than focusing on the God-given abilities I was born with. Blogging is very comfortable for me, because it allows me to interact with a small audience in a few paragraphs or less on various experiences, opinions, and social commentary that I would typically express in a water cooler conversation with friends. I look at blogging as bursts of random conversation here and there about a myriad of topics. Whether I am articulating my reasons for why Rick and Michonne should be together from The Walking Dead to talking about my favorite black female cartoon characters. It's just naturally easy for me.
Creative writing however, is a completely different animal. Technically I have written close to 45 stories. I have written supernatural alien sci-fi fiction to stories about the post-college experience. My problem is I will start writing a piece and then I cannot finish. I have suffered from the disease of writers block for decades and I just can't shake the syndrome. Sometimes I wonder if stating that I have writers block is in fact a "cop out" of some sort.
I've finally decided that I have to face my fears and just do it. I need to stop back pedaling and emerging myself in self-doubt. It's time to just commit to a story and have a beginning, middle, and end. I've decided that perhaps I should go the short story route and work my way up. The first story I ever finished was actually a screenplay. I'm sad to say that the file that it saved it on was destroyed and that screenplay is no longer in existence, but it was the best feeling in the world to start a story and finish it. My screen play was 112 pages long, which is enough for a feature length film.
I think what will work best for me, it to just completely engage in the act of writing every day or at least every other day. I'm grateful that this blog allows me to practice and also enforces some accountability by readers for me to create new content. I want to one day start publishing works of fiction in the literary world. I have so many friends and people I know who are published authors that are out there doing it. The eBook industry makes it so easy for anyone to self publish with little to no money. My prayer is that one day I can finally call myself a published author. I also enjoy screenwriting, so to call myself a screenwriter would be an additional perk as well.
For now I just will focus on writing and also constantly read to keep my brain active and growing. It's a scary road facing your fears. I have always been so fearful of my own success, but slowly I realize I'm doing it. I'm finally doing it.
