My Alien Love


I’m a Predator fan.  I’ve been one since its inception; John McTiernan’s 1987 masterpiece introduced the world to a fierce hunting machine.  Created by brothers Jim & John Thomas, the Predator (created by the great Stan Winston and brought to life by the great Kevin Peter Hall) caught my attention in a way that hasn’t been rivaled since.  Predator is my all-time favorite movie; I can quote it and re-enact scenes.

"If it bleeds, we can kill it."

"There's something out there hunting us, and it ain't no man."

"I ain't got time to bleed."

"What are you going to try next? Cheese?"

"This stuff will make you a g*ddamn sexual Tyrannosaurus."
 What I like about this movie is how it comes off as a standard-rate commando flick, but then deviates into sci-fi with the introduction of the eponymous title character.  Six Special Forces soldiers and a CIA agent go looking for hostages in the thick Guatemala jungle.  The soldiers, led by Dutch (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger) are a rescue team, but they are also trained killers who are armed to the teeth.  Dutch and his men find where the hostages are held and blow the compound to smithereens.  As they are making their way out of the area, they are hunted by an unseen entity.  The entity sees in infrared and it tracks Dutch & his men as they head towards the extraction point.  Having seen how dangerous the men are, the entity—the Predator—kills them one by one and keeps their skulls as trophies.  Arnold survives, of course (this was the 80s, when everything he touched turned to gold).  Nowadays, he'd get smoked during the opening credits, but I digress.

I remember the moment when I first saw the infrared vision and was awed by it.  The Predator picks up a dying scorpion that was crushed by Mac (played by Bill Duke), and we see it go from red to black as it dies in the Predator's clawed hand.  At the time, I’d never seen anything like that before.  Then I saw the Predator and I couldn’t make sense of what I was seeing.  Here was this amazing character, over seven feet tall, with Rastafarian dreads, a shoulder cannon, arm blades, long black fingernails and a freakin’ nuke attached to its forearm.  It was a total and complete badass that had absolutely no f*cks to give.

"You want some?  Then bring it!"
Then, during the climactic scene, it removes its mask.  Arnold’s response?  “You’re one ugly motherf*cker,” and if he never told the truth again, he for damn sure told it that day.  Because the Predator is ugly as hell.  It’s got tiny little sunken eyes, lizard-like skin, fangs, mandibles…see for yourself:

"Your momma."
And I ADORE it!!!  I do.  I am here for this alien warrior; I have clocked in.  I love this creature, this hunter, this ultimate badass who lives for nothing but the hunt.  And clearly, I am not the only one.  Since Predator, there has been a sequel, two spin-offs and a reboot.  Predator 2 has a new hunter terrorizing Los Angeles.  The spin-offs, Alien vs. Predator (AvP) and Alien vs. Predator Requiem (AvPR) pit the galaxy’s greatest hunter against the galaxy’s greatest terror, the Xenomorph.  The unnecessary reboot, Predators, basically recycles much of McTiernan’s classic, but does so on another planet which serves as a game reserve. With this particular film, we are introduced to the Super Black Predators; hunters that are bigger and stronger than their cousins. They're outcasts, as they have no honor, which is an essential trait in Predators.

The species name of the humanoid hunters is Yautja (e-WAT-ya), and they live on Yautja Prime.  Comic books and other media have expanded their universe.  I’ve not yet read the books and it may be that I won’t, as I am satisfied with the film canon.  However, I won’t make any promises, because I know better.

As I've said, my favorite movie is Predator.  Ranking the rest of the movies: AvP, Predator 2, Predators, and then AvPR.  Each movie gives us a little bit of Yautja culture.  Predator 2 did the danggone thing and showed us a shipful of Yautja from different clans.  AvP showed us one method of how the Predators handle their business when it comes to hunting Xenomorphs.  Plus Sanaa Lathan is in it and kicks major Alien booty.  AvPR actually showed us about 20 seconds' worth of Yautja Prime and a little of what happens on a Predator ship, and Predators introduce us to the Super Black Predators.  We won't go into the utter fail of that name.

So here’s a lineup of the movie Predators:

Jungle Hunter (Predator)


City Hunter (Predator 2)

Scar (AvP)


Celtic (AvP)



Wolf (AvPR)



Falconer (Predators)




Tracker (Predators)




Berserker (Predators)





And this pimplucious Elder Predator (Predator 2), who makes an appearance at the end of AvP.  
He's even more awesome in that scene, as he sports a red cape.

 
Everything about the Yautja fascinates me.  Everything.  With each movie, I learned more and more about them and all I want is to know more.  I would truly love it if another movie was made (an original story; no remakes, reboots, or any of that crap) that took place in space or on Yautja Prime. I want more.  I'm greedy and there is so much richness to these characters.

To the powers that be, please make another Predator movie.  Don’t recycle old stuff; make something new and completely different.  Have a crew of humans crash-land on Yautja Prime and allow the shenanigans to ensue.  Maybe have a crew of both species end up on the same planet.  Something.  Anything.  Whatever you do, don’t be stupid with it.  Just give the heads what they want, and cast Sanaa Lathan.

Any questions?
 

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