My problem is that I am not sexually attracted to this nicest guy in the world and I feel super guilty about it. I don't know what’s wrong with me; I feel like a horrible and shallow person by saying this but I am not attracted to his body type. We haven't had sex, and we rarely kiss when he tries to make out with me (I usually have to force myself when we do). He has asked me on several occasions if I am not attracted to him and I have always lied and said that I am and that I am not ready to have sex, but the truth is I am not ready to have sex with him.There are five things to take away from this.
Recently he has introduced me to his family and has even mentioned the "love" and "marriage" words, and now I am confused and afraid that I am far to into it to just tell him that I am not into him. I don’t want to hurt his feelings as I believe in Karma and think that it will come back to bite me. I want to be sexually attracted to him because I think he will be a good provider and is definitely marriage material but I don't know how to get myself there. I have read self-help books to try and seek the answer to this question but with no help. I can't have a conversation with my girlfriends because I am afraid they will judge me. I don't know what to do. I don't want to end up alone or realize that he was the best thing in my life after he is gone. Please help. — Not Sexually Attracted
1. Never put much credence in anything that women tell you with regards to love, romance, sex, and dating. There is no point in asking women about these things because while they may occasionally tell the truth, they lie so readily that it renders their words totally unreliably. The guy senses that she's not attracted to him, he asks her about it... and she promptly lies to him. Repeatedly. So, how's that working for everyone? The solution is to go with your gut and don't bother asking her about it. And when in doubt, walk. I've never known any man to look back and regret doing so, as usually subsequent events reveal worse behavior than was suspected.
2. Women aren't attracted to kindness, caring respectfulness, or being treated like a lady, even when they desperately want to be. They might - might - appreciate those things in a man to whom they are already attracted, but that's about it.
3. If a woman doesn't attempt to put her tongue down your throat when you're kissing her, move on. Women generally love kissing, so those who give polite little chicken pecks instead of throwing themselves into it are simply are not into you. Find one who is.
4. Always add "with you" when a woman makes statements like "I'm not ready to have sex" or "I'm not looking for a relationship". A woman who is into you will do ANYTHING to be with you, including cheating on her husband, so you're misleading yourself if you think time is going to change or cure anything.
5. Attraction is binary. Even when it takes a while to kick in, it's a totally subconscious process. If it's there, you'll know it. If it's not there, you'll suspect it. Ergo, if you suspect it's not there, it's not there. You can't make a woman be attracted to you, she either is or she isn't. The only thing you can do is increase your Sex Rank and see if she happens to respond to it. If not, don't worry, someone else will. Someone else always will.
Of course, there is always the sixth point. Learn Game or develop at least a moderate case of narcissistic sociopathy. Either will attract the women.
