Why You Should Hold On to the F***s You Give

It's a pretty rough world out there. It's even rougher when you feel like you're a minority in a minority with little people to hold your back or even talk to. I've often felt this way growing up and even in my adulthood. I'm sure that we've all felt this way, especially by identifying as a girl blerd. It's probably one of the main reasons this blog was created.

Over the past few months, I was struggling even harder with accepting things and myself. I lost my confidence, I was super timid, and just floated along. It was effecting my social life, relationship, work life, virtually everything. When I was in high school, even though I was very quiet, I gave very few fucks about what people thought. I was low key arrogant but kept to myself. I was me and I was gonna do what I wanted no matter what anyone said. As adulthood started to approach and once I landed my first "big girl" job, this all changed. I felt like I had to be someone else almost. It took a very long, and pretty painful, heart-to-heart with my boyfriend to change this. I realized I needed to keep my fucks to myself.

Day after day, I stopped caring so much how people looked at me. Now, I'm not saying you should go out the house wearing any old thing, hair wild, and with a slight odor. However, I no longer tried to dress beyond what I was comfortable in. I'm fortunate we have a pretty lax dress code so no more heels, minimum makeup, slacks everyday except Friday. After almost 10 years, I finally got blue highlights in my hair. I was always self-conscious about sticking out at work more than normal and I definitely got lots of questions. Stopped caring. I'm the youngest in my office in a position of power but people often ran over me. That stopped. I voiced my opinion. Hard and loud. They were going to listen to me. Good, bad, or ugly.

I spoke up when I had a problem with my friends, family, boyfriend, whoever. I got the stress off my chest then instead of letting it harbor and explode. I smiled more. I stood taller. I just stopped caring about how the world as a whole viewed me and cared mostly about how I viewed myself. So what I was putting on some weight? These thighs look GREAT! I'm aiming for those Chun-Li legs. I'm still sexy with my little pooch going on. I took it upon myself to write notes all over my apartment to remind myself that I'm beautiful, confident, and deserve to be happy. I deserve to be me and comfortable with myself.

Thanks Exocomics! = D

So ladies and gentlemen, I sincerely implore you to take some of those fucks you decide to give about what your family, friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, loved ones, animals, whoever and toss a few (a lot) out. Save some for a rainy day. You deserve to be the blerdy you that you are without conforming or living uncomfortably just to make someone else happy. Ain't nobody got time for all that.