I know many of you experience the judgement of being a girl gamer or comic book guru. It seems like most people (boys and girls) thinks it is for attention that you would even like anything that is remotely nerdy. You probably have been openly mocked or even had people dissect your every move. It can be hurtful and I can relate. I had an awful experience when I was 16. I asked a few guys at work if I could come and play a game with them one day.
Most of the guys was okay with me coming to play with them except one, James*. He told me flat out,"Games are for boys and makeup is for girls. Why don't find a new hobby?" I was pretty taken aback by his comments and it really hurt my feelings. Then I did something that I have told myself, after this situation, I would never do, begged if I could go. James then proceeds to say," I would do you but,not play games with you. I'm only being honest." I waited for the guys to come to my rescue, but they suddenly changed their tune too. They all agreed in accordance that I shouldn't go and that I should find some girls to be friends with. Well there is so many things that was wrong with this.
First, girls can be excellent gamers and fun to hang out with. Me being around them would certainly make everyone that was there wither and die with my presence. Second, maybe I don't want to wear makeup and find a new hobby. I kind of like playing games and reading comic books. Third, who says that they "do" someone? I mean at least take me to dinner and half way pretend that you like me. Well I wasn't as matured as I am today, I took it so hard that I stopped playing games all together. I could not find anyone who wanted to play with me or even invite me to gamer parties. I began to be depressed because I couldn't do what I always loved to do. Well during this time I found a new love by happenstance. I was walking with a friend to a classroom to get her book bag. A teacher began to talk to me. She asked me to come back because she had some plays coming up and she always needed help with each play. Well we continued to talk to each other and she told me about the costume department. From then on, I found a new passion that no one judged me for liking. I had so much fun my junior and senior year, but I always felt like I was missing something though. The feeling never went away, not even with feathers and fabric glue.
My college years were a blur and I changed my major so much that even the advisers started wondering what was going on with my life. I didn't really know what I wanted to do with my life. I really loved fashion, but I also wanted to be somewhere where I could be me. I never found my niche and I started to be very depressed. I had a few great friends and they couldn't snap me out of this rut. Fast forward three years, I'm married with a little girl and I still have the itch that I'm missing something. Well the other day I was buying another product for my natural hair (yes I'm a product junkie), I passed a comic book store. I kept telling myself that I would stop in. Months have passed and I started to beat myself up for not going. I told myself that I would randomly pop in and just actually shop.
Well today, I'm going to stop by the comic book store. I'm going to shop for new comics and I'm not going to care what people think about me. I might even buy a game or two and have game/comics day. Never change who you are because you will always be unhappy and make everyone else miserable.
*Names was changed because why would I acknowledge a douche bag? :).
Brittany Stringfield Logan is the writer and creator of The Lows and Woes of a Natural Girl she's into all things nerdy including Star Wars, Star Trek, Comic Books, and Graphic Novels. She is currently featured on Black Girl Nerd's BGN Girl series.
